I don't feel like a mom...

Just call me a sheep...

2009-11-19T17:02:00.000-08:00

You can now find me on Facebook. I know, I know, but it's a lot less work. http://www.facebook.com/midagasm

Michelle

Boredom

2008-07-17T16:55:00.000-07:00

Today was my day off and I don't know what to do with myself.

I only have one kid at home and he's pretty self-sufficient. Boo is with my sis-n-law and Babygirl is at camp. So. I took a picture of myself. Interesting turnout, no?

Kind of Hnt-y. Happy HNT by the way!!!!

Honest R&B Lovesong

2008-05-28T21:02:00.000-07:00

You must watch this, finally a song that's more like real life!

by runawaybox

3rd Anniversary HNT

2008-05-15T16:36:00.000-07:00

Osbasso has pulled together a great celebration for all of us HNTers. He did an excellent job so go check it out!

Mother's Day ~ Making Out Like A Bandit

2008-05-14T18:14:00.000-07:00

Mother's day was pretty awesome for your's truly. My husband gave me these:

Aren't they beautiful?

Boo gave me this:

In case you're wondering it's a snake. And it's on my dash.

My beautiful sister and my lovely mother gave me probably the most expensive and quite possibly the awesomest gift I have ever received. LOVE YOU GUYS!!!:

Yep, an iPhone! How cool am I?

I also finally got to go on a The Swiss Avenue Home and Garden Tour. Extremly gorgeous old historic homes. I've been wanting to do one for a very long time so my dear husband sucked it up and took me. Really great day!

Boo at the tour:

Rambling

2008-05-09T15:04:00.001-07:00

Open letter to the gangbanger in the Olds on I-30:

Dear Assmonkey,

I'm so sorry that I dared to get over in your lane. It was just that the huge truck in front of me was going 40mph on the highway and I really wanted to get home. My 16 year old had just been released from the hospital and we were both extremely exhausted. If I had known that you would then pull up next to me, give me your best gangster glare and then proceed to come into the lane and try to occupy the very same space my car was already in I would have refrained from getting over at all. Oh, and BTW, if your gang initiation was to kill someone by car, I have one word for you: FAIL!

Thank you,

Your fellow highway driver,

Michelle

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In other news, Bits did not make the tennis team, unfortunately, but didn't seem all that upset about it. When he came home on Monday after finding out I said, "Well?" and he goes, "What?" I said, "Hellooo, the tennis tryouts." and he just said, "Oh, I didn't make it."

Well ok then.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Babygirl is doing well after her most recent stint in the hospital getting chemo. She had this weird pain in her chest while we were there and they did an EKG but everything looked normal. When we got out she had all this energy and felt better than she had in months but that kind of petered out so now she is back to her normal level of exhaustion.

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PICTURES!!

At the Dallas Zoo

Out with friends!

Introducing Fleur!

2008-05-01T21:45:00.000-07:00

Here's our new kitty! We got her at the local animal shelter which is overrun with kittens right now. (Spring and all that.) Doesn't she have the sweetest little face?

They told us when we adopted her that she is 5 weeks old but when I got her home I knew better. She didn't know how to eat out of a dish or use a litter box and today when we took her to the vet, she said she is no older than 3 or 4 weeks. They also said that it was a good thing we adopted her because she would be much better cared for. I just feel bad for her littermates.

She is going to be one loved kitty!

Stuff Husbands Say ~ And A Meme

2008-04-28T20:56:00.001-07:00

In the kitchen while cooking, I realize I forgot to preheat the oven.

Me~ "Damn it, Michelle, your such a stupid idiot."

Mark~ "But you're really good in the sack."

Nice.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Who did you last shoot a dirty look at?
The dude that tried to sell me four tires at the tire shop, when all I wanted was a patch job.

What kind of car do you drive?
Chrysler 300 Touring Edition~ I lurve my car

Have you ever had a garage sale?
Yes

What color is your iPod?
I don't have one. I know, I know, both of my girls have one but I have a Sansa.

What kind of dog do you have?
Siberian Husky named Bevo~my sweetie

What's for dinner tonight?
Pork loin, asparagus and rosemary potatoes

What is the last drink you drank?
Iced tea~ the Texas state drink

Last time you were sick?
About a month ago with stomach gunk

How long is your hair?
Idk, a little above my bra strap

Are you happy right now?
Eh.

What did you say last?
GO BRUSH YOUR TEETH AND GO TO BED!!

Do you drink beer?
No, yuk!

Have your brothers or sisters ever told you that you were adopted?
Of course among other unnice things.

What is your favorite key chain on your keys?
My black furry ball. I get lots of comments.

What is in your pocket?
Uh, no pockets.

Who is the last person you had a phone conversation with?
My husband about what the kids want for breakfast.

What DVD is in your DVD player?
Nothing, last movie in there was '30 Days Of Night' which totally sucked, no pun intended

What's something fun you did today?
Got to hold my 3 week old niece. Sheepy-head.

What do you think of when you hear the word "meow"?
Cat

What are you listening to right now?
Some black dude in a dress, sports show, Bill Maher...etc.

What have you had to drink so far today?
Obviously too much, I feel bloated.

When is your birthday?
June 22

What's the area code for your cell phone?
469.

Where did you buy the shirt you're wearing now?
Express, love their thin t-shirts

Is there anything hanging from your rear view mirror?
Yes, a handicap placard and two hospital masks for Meagan

What are you going to do after this?
Get ready for bed and clean up

What is something you need to go shopping for?
New tires, apparently

Do you like pickles?
Yes I do. I even had one today at my son's baseball game. Yum.

How about olives?
Absolutely, green, black, kalmata(sp?)

What is your favorite kind of gum?
Orbit, cinnamon

Do you have any tan lines?
No, i tanned yesterday in a ten minute bed. Only stayed in for 7 minutes and my ass, back and stomach all got burned. I've got redass, heehee.

Do you remember the name of your kindergarten teacher?
Hmm, no. I went to 3 different schools when I was in kindergarten, I remember that much.

When you're at the grocery store do you use the self checkout?
No, I can't like it. It's too bossy.

Has anyone ever sang to you?
My husband has. Jokingly.

Has anyone ever given you roses?
Yes, a few times. But I prefer to get something more substantial.

If you were abandoned in the wilderness, would you survive?
Probably not, my big ass would attract some type of predator. Or I'd fall off a cliff or something. Plus, i dont know how to use a rock and a stick to start a fire.

What is your favorite color?
Dark Red
(Going with you on this one Melanie)

What color are your eyes?
Brown

What is a compliment you receive way too often?
Not that I am complaining, I get told I look really young all the time. I consider that a compliment.

How tall are you?
5 foot 6 inches

Who was the last person to say they loved you and when?
Babygirl~ over myspace an hour ago

Do you like your parents?
I love my parents, alot.

Where is the furthest place you've traveled?
Probably, Niagra Falls.

Which do you prefer, to eat or sleep?
Sleep. But i also like to eat and i have proof.

Do you look more like your mom or your dad?
I have no idea. My dad says i look like my mom, so...

How long does it take you to shower?
About 20 minutes. I know i'm bad. I like to be clean I can't help it.

Can you do splits?
Not anymore, I could just barely in high school.

Can you use the grill?
I rock at grilling.

Are you flexible?
Not in the least.

What movie do you want to see?
Idk, something scary.

How many hours of sleep did you get last night?
Went to bed at 12:15 got up at 5:30, you do the math.

Do you wear your seatbelt in the car?
Each and every time.

Are you scared of flying?
A little bit, yeah. Not enough to keep my from flying though. (I don't think) I haven't flown since i was in my early twenties.

What do you sleep in?
A nightie. Has to have spaghetti straps and be short. I don't like to be all covered up but I don't like to sleep naked either.

Do you have any tattoos?
No, but i would like to get one. Just a little girly one.

Have you ever been to Los Angeles?
No, i think the closest i have ever gotten was Riverside.

What jewelry do you wear all the time?
Bracelets and necklace.

What is your favorite song at the moment?
Don't have one right now, i've been listening to alot of old stuff.

What song do you HATE?
More Than Words by Exteme. HATEHATEHATE. I hear two seconds and I'm out!

Do you like chocolate?
Of course. Mmmmm.

Are you easy to get along with?
Most of the time. When I'm not moody or on my period. Ha.

If Celebs Moved to Oklahoma

2008-04-26T15:57:00.000-07:00

Pretty damn funny.

Good Luck to Bits!

2008-04-23T21:12:00.000-07:00

Bits is trying out for his middle school's tennis team tomorrow, so please wish him lots of luck! He is so nervous and keeps saying he isn't going to make it but I think he will. Please think of him tomorrow and send him some positive vibes.

Conversations With Boo

2008-04-20T15:29:00.000-07:00

(Between Mark and Boo)

Boo: "Dad, what's a conscious?"

Mark: "Oh, you mean a conscience. It's that little voice inside your head that tells you not to do things you aren't suppose to do."

Boo: (Thinking) "Well, mine tells me to just do it*."

*This is why she can't stay out of trouble at school.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Boo: "I read from the bible in Sunday School today."

Mark: "Oh yeah, what did you read?"

Boo: "Do everything without grumbling and arguing. Fallopians 1:18."

Mark: "I think you might mean Philippians. Hahaha!"

Bits, Boo and Babygirl

But Was It A Double Dog Dare?

2008-03-14T20:55:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting at work on Wednesday morning and my cell phone starts ringing. I look at the screen and it is my youngest daughter's school calling. The first thing that goes through my mind of course is, 'Crap, now what?'

There are three things that Boo's school calls about.

#1~ Illness. With Boo this has only happened twice.

#2~ Injury. This happens a little more frequently owing to the fact that she is a total klutz.

and

#3~ Trouble. This seems to be happening more and more these days.

Well, lucky me it just happens to be a #3. (Ha, that rhymes!)

Her teacher, Mrs. Hite, tells me that Boo has gotten in trouble and that she is going to let her tell me what happened. She gives Boo the phone and I hear this pathetic little "Hello." I ask her what happened and she informs me that she just got in trouble for.......(OMG, this is so embarrassing).....kissing someones butt. Yes, she kissed a little boy's butt. Why, you ask? After telling her that that is nasty I asked her why she did it and she say's, "SHE DARED ME! SHE CALLED ME A CHICKEN!"

Haha! Lovely isn't it? My daughter is prone to giving in to peer pressure and not even for something fun. I told her if something like this ever happens again to tell the person she rather be a chicken than a butt-kisser. Her misunderstanding response, "BUT I DON'T WANT TO BE A CHICKEN AND A BUTT-KISSER! ....Oohh boy.

Boo (on the left) and my niece.

It's A No Go

2008-01-08T19:26:00.000-08:00

Well, chemo didn't happen today. It seems every kid in Dallas is sick at the moment and they didn't have one single bed to put Babygirl in. Oh well, I kinda wanted to get it over with, all this anxiety can't possibly be good but shit happens so what ya gonna do? It will probably be Friday before they can get her in. I'll keep everyone posted.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

While watching Romney's "silver" speech after coming in second in New Hampshire:

Mark: "New Hampshire Rocks!"

Boo: "Dad, what's New Hamster?"

Chemo Shmemo...

2008-01-07T19:41:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow Babygirl goes into the hospital to get chemo. She will be getting two new medicines, Cisplatin and Lomustine, plus Vincristine which she has had before. She doesn't usually have to be admitted but they have to keep her in the hospital after they administer the two new ones so they can keep her hydrated because they cause the hated nausea and vomiting.

Keep us in your prayers!

Just So You Know..

2008-01-06T09:53:00.001-08:00

If you previously were unable to comment, I've fixed it so everyone can, sorry about that.

The Sky Is The Limit

2007-12-27T19:04:00.000-08:00

We received phone call a few days ago from Lori. Lori is a 'wish granter' with the Make a Wish Foundation and wanted to speak to me about Babygirl. I spoke with her today and Babygirl gets to wish for one of the following four:

~If you could be anybody, who would you be?
~If you could go anywhere, where would you go?
~If you could meet anyone, who would you meet?
~If you could have anything, what would you want?

Lori told me to have Babygirl to come up with atleast one answer for all four questions. Well, she is having a little trouble coming up with an answer for some of these questions. So does anyone have any ideas? What would you wish for?

Sometimes.....

2007-12-13T11:36:00.000-08:00

..bad things happen to good people. It's not fair and no matter what you do, you can't keep it from happening. This is a lesson I've come to terms with recently, through my own personal experiences and from seeing things go on around me. You can't sit and think about what you did or didn't do or blame yourself for not seeing it coming....sometimes you just have to go with the flow and take it as it comes. It only makes you stronger.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I just want to thank all the people out there who thought and/or prayed about us. I truly believe that it has helped us get through the first part of Babygirl's treatment.

If you haven't heard through my sister Tammy's website, my 15 yr old daughter was recently diagnosed w/ brain cancer. Scariest shit ever, I tell you, but she is the strongest girl I have ever met. She's looking this thing right in the eye and telling it to kiss her ass. There have been a few complications because of the surgery to remove it but she is improving everyday and we have just finished radiation and her first round of chemo. Yay!!! Please just keep thinking of us and keep us in your prayers because every bit helps.

Thanks again internets,
Michelle

My Husband's Sentiments Exactly...

2007-07-02T21:02:00.001-07:00

Ouch...And WOSM

2007-05-21T20:13:00.000-07:00

I can't move my head. What in the hell do you think I did in my sleep to make my neck decide not to do it's job and allow my head to turn side to side? I look like a robot (or a dork) when I turn my whole body just to see what is next to me. Apparently this is quite funny to see.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I have a late WOSM (Waste of space Monday) for those who participate. This is sponsored by my lovely sister, Tammy.

Boo is the one flashing the Longhorn signsTonight at my daughter, Boo's, T Ball game my husband (her coach)was threatened by a police officer. Did Mark try to steal someone's equipment or kidnap some unsuspecting little girl? No. He DARED win the game between his and said police officer's teams.

The game started with the PO (police officer) telling my husband that they only had eight players but they had a little girl that could play, she just wouldn't have a uniform. Mark, being the good sport that he is, said that would be OK. After one inning the little girl (who looked to be about 3 years old) decided she didn't want to play anymore and was missing from their lineup for the rest of the game. Again, Mark didn't make a big deal and didn't make them take an out every time she was supposed to bat. He could have done this but he is a good guy and he was being nice.

This team basically did whatever they wanted and Mark never said a word. What didn't help is the fact that the umpire was a clueless old man who didn't call the coach out when was clearly doing things against the rules. The ump really screwed up when he called the game as soon as time ran out, even though we were home team and we were supposed to get last at bat.

Thinking they had won, PO's team lined up as Mark and the other coaches were telling the ump that he was badly mistaken and that we still had an at bat. The umpire went to get clarification and before he got back PO had his team leave the field. Well, when the ump got back he said he was wrong and we needed to finish the game. PO was PO'd. He sat arguing w/ the ump for the next ten minutes but finally agreed to finish. Well, it ended with us winning by a point and after the game the ump called both coaches over.

He wanted to apologize and let them know that it would never happen again. The whole time the ump is talking, PO is staring at Mark like they are two boxers going before the ref in a prize fight. Mark finally looks at PO and asks him why he is staring at him. PO tells Mark he needs to be quiet. Mark asks again why he is staring at him and PO replies, "Coach, just walk away before you get hurt."

What? A police officer threatening someone over a t-ball game? How ridiculous is that?

I just have to mention that Mark is the most sportsmanship minded coach ever. We are the first place team in the league and our girls could run over every team out there. But instead of doing that he switches out our infield and outfield so we don't ever get too far up on any team. He teaches them how to play the game right and with GOOD SPORTSMANSHIP.

I'm just glad my daughter has someone like Mark to look up to instead of some asshat like PO.

HNT # 23 ~ Ghostly Red Lips

2007-05-16T20:59:00.000-07:00

I know it's been a looooong time but I'm still allowed to post for HNT aren't I?

Go see the other Half-nekkid people over at Osbasso's place.

Goofy Kids

2007-05-16T20:20:00.000-07:00

This video was made by my daughter's friends on her softball team. These girls obviously have too much time (and tape) on their hands.

Hiii!

2007-04-05T17:46:00.000-07:00

Dang this place is dusty.

Random

2006-12-07T20:37:00.000-08:00

~I have a 30 yr old friend at work that had no idea what cunnilingus was.....is it just me or do you also find that odd?

~I really want a MP3 player that has video, the new Damien Rice CD and a new pair of Levi's jeans. What do YOU want for Christmas?

~My dog, Bevo, has a new friend. It's the absolutely ugliest dog I have ever seen.

~Boo, whose real name I won't disclose has decided to change her name to Cloe. So what ever you do make sure you use this name when you address her or she will get pissed. (Her last name change was 'Kelly Clarkson'.)

~If you are in a managerial or supervisory position at your job, please watch yourself, micromanaging is highly annoying.

~Tammy, thank you for all you do for me, including putting up with my spawn when I work late.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Everyday my husband comes home from a hard day's work and the first thing he does is to change out of his dirty UPS uniform. He has a little quirk about having to take any stray lint out of his belly button once he takes his shirt off. Fine, right? A little weird but who wants a dirty belly button.
Well, sometimes the lint is quite plentiful which I figure is due to the fact he has one of the deepest belly buttons that I have ever seen. Of course, being the manboy that he is, he will then threaten anyone nearby with whatever he has fished out and everyone scatters.
People, the other day he comes home and pulls out the Godzilla of belly button lint. I give you what has to be a world record:
This picture doesn't do it justice, you can only really get the full effect if you are being chased by it. (Shudder)

Hehheh...

2006-11-20T20:31:00.000-08:00

Somebody found my blog by searching for cooch. Teehee. :D

More Perry, Less Filling

2006-11-07T19:25:00.000-08:00

Shit, and double shit!!!

2006-11-03T16:42:00.000-08:00

:] hiiiii.

this is babygirl on my mother's blog wanting to tell everyone that i found her song.
not wanting her to take all the credit for finding a wonderful song.

she never posts about me so i figure i would post for her!
and i write this as my mom complains about how i don't capitalize anything.
i hate capital letters.
so, i am going to write five things that i do and don't like!

like:
1. deep conversations, things that make me think
2. writing, since i want to become a writer and all
3. food, i eat constantly
4. i like playing softball and working out and stuff
5. scary movies! even though most of the time i hide my eyes, but hey it's the thought that counts

dislike:
1. drama, one of the main things that go around my highschool
2. ignorant people and people who act stupid just to get people's attention
3. certain people on this planet
4. when people talk and talk and talk, shut up already i don't feel like listening to you
5. people treat me like i am a child, hello yeah i know i am fourteen but how much you want to bet i have more sense then you do

now, leave a bunch of comments okay!?

Halloween And Such...

2006-11-01T20:56:00.000-08:00

Hope you all had a great Halloween, ours was great. I will hopefully get pictures on if I can get my beautiful and flatulent sister to put them on for me. My damn camera is FUBAR, so I have to depend on the kindness of others, unfortunately.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Have you ever known someone that likes to put down things or people that you just happen to like. I know a couple of people that will constantly rain on my parade.

Take for example: My daughter, Babygirl, plays for a coach that also happens to coach our local high school baseball team. We absolutely love this guy. He is great w/ the girls and he makes it not only competitive but fun for the team. He has also been a great influence in Babygirl's life, just a really nice guy. Well, in comes "Negativity Incarnate" and tells me that since "Coach" has been coaching the H.S. team it has gone down the toilet and that we should be in the playoffs every year but he just doesn't know how to do his job, blah, blah, blah.... This person KNOWS that we are really close to "Coach" yet still sits there and says these kinds of things to me. Even if it were true, which it isn't, why do people do that? WHY? Do they think I can't live without knowing their stupid opinion? This absolutely drives me batshit.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Conversation with Boo (Age 5)

Boo: "I learned about personal space today."

Me: "Oh really. What did you learn?"

Boo: " I learned everybody has there own space, and other people shouldn't get in it."

Me: " Why did you learn that, did someone get in yours?"

Boo: "Noooo, I got in somebody elses."

Me: " Oh, of course."

Errrg.

2006-10-12T20:18:00.000-07:00

~I'm sorry you don't like what we are going to wear. Nobody else has a problem with it, get over it already.

~You're part of a billion dollar company, give us a break for crying out loud. Why do we have to pay for your fucking screw up.

~This house isn't going to clean itself you know!!

~Stop acting like you're in high school! The best way to make your marriage work is to stop fucking around w/ the coach of your daughter's t-ball team! But I'm sure that marriage counseling you're getting is gonna do you some good, even if you are getting some on the side. Riiiight.

~Oh! And you put the dick back in your pants!

~Will everybody please stay on their meds, just so the rest of us don't have to worry about sending our kids to school. Thanks.

~Just so you know, I really don't care. I'm just a very good actress.

Whew. That feels a little better.

Pride And Sadness

2006-09-23T20:26:00.000-07:00

Dustin
As soon as I saw this picture of my nephew, the tears just started pouring. He's really there. How can I feel so much pride and so much sadness at the same time?

My Little Butterfly

2006-09-18T19:53:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, we went to Whole Foods Market on Greenville Ave. and they were celebrating their 20th anniversary at that location. They were giving away prizes and free samples and they had several things for the kids including a face painter. The woman that was doing it was amazing. She does parties so I'm thinking about hiring her for Boo's next birthday.

She looked so pretty and look! she rocks at the self portrait thing.

The only bad thing was that she didn't want to wash it off and didn't understand that she wouldn't be able to wear it to school to show all of her friends. Poor baby, she started crying when I told her that and it got all smeared which made her cry harder.

Creative Babygirl

2006-09-11T21:17:00.000-07:00

These are done by my oldest daughter, both the pictures and the poem. She is so creative and she definitely doesn't get it from me. In the first picture she somehow used the moon to make a star. She's awesome, huh?

Nothing has ever been more beautiful
Staring upon this sky has never meant more
I am lost beyond return
I wont come back
No I am not coming back
I love this life of no control
No control of what I feel
No control of anything in my life
This is amazing
I am out of my mind
Staring out onto nothing
Seeing more than anyone else can see
I am hallucinating
what beautiful things I am seeing
I am a living breathing mess
Beyond repair
I love this
I just love this
I see beauty in space
I see beauty in completely everything which is nothing
This feeling I have is amazing
I feel nothing at all
No pain
No heartache
not even joy
But it's amazing
I wish it would stay
If only it would stay
I love being so high on this
High on nothing at all

Sunday Six - College

2006-08-12T20:22:00.000-07:00

Sunday Six brought to us by Kelly. This week's theme is College. Answers by Boo, age 5.

1. What is College?

Where you get your work.

2. What are the names of some colleges?

Um, what? Blue. Pink.

3. Is a college the same thing as a university.

Yes.

4. What is a major?

I dunno.

5. What do people do in college?

Make a holiday.

6. Do you want to go to college and if so, where?

Yes. Pink.

Need to talk to this child about college.

Boo and her cousin Fumble.

HNT # 22 ~ The Shirt On My Back

2006-07-19T20:29:00.000-07:00

The Os-shirt tour continues here in Tejas with my offering of:

The Kimono,

And for all you T & A fans, I give you:

Saturate,

It's been a pleasure. Want to know why I'm half-nekkid? Go see my internet crush.

Check It Out!

2006-07-18T16:53:00.000-07:00

Watch my video, it is hot!! Especialmente, el caballero.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Damn weather pixie is a cooch.

Public Service Announcement

2006-07-17T20:56:00.000-07:00

I think I drove one of the nice customer service ladies at my electric company, TXU Electric, a little crazy tonight. A little background. For May, my bill was $360.00 and my June bill is for $330.oo. After reading my bill and their "Terms of Service" which states that the more kWh(Kilowatt-hours) you use, the less you pay, I notice this little note on my bill..."The average price you paid for electric service this month was 15.07 cents per kWh." Hmmm, that is the HIGHEST rate and we used a whole shitload of kWhs, which should mean that I pay the LOWEST rate, right? RIGHT?! Sooo, I decide to call and get to the bottom of this little mystery.

CS: This is MeWithAVeryThickAccent, how can I help you?

Me: (Speaking very fast)I was looking at my bill, and I was wanting to know how it is calculated because it states that my rate is 15.7 cents and my usage is over 2000 kWh(2233 kWh to be exact), soo it should be 14.5 cents.

CS: Oh, ok...Can you hold while I research that?

Me: Sure. (Ha! Stumped her already!)

CS: (Back on the line after several minutes) Thank you for patiently holding. OK, what you do is multiply your 2233 by 14.5 cents.

Me: Uh-huh. Did that, it didn't work. It adds up to less than my bill.

CS: Ooohh. Ok.

Me: I multiplied all your listed rates to my usage and none of them adds up to my bill.

At this point she tells me to try several different things, all to no avail.

CS: Can you please hold?

Me: Sure, but for how long?

CS: (Laughs shrilly) 3 minutes.

Me: OK. (Let me add that as I'm waiting the muzak they are playing suddenly stops, there-by making me think I've been disconnected. It comes back on after about 20 seconds. I think they do this on purpose so the less determined people will hang up.)

CS: (After 5 minutes and said with great hope) Mrs. *******?

Me: (Sweetly) Yes.

CS: OK, multiply 0.1191033 to 2233.

Me: (Searching for this strange # everywhere) 0.1191033, where did that come from?......No! It doesn't add up either.

CS: Uhhhh.....

All the sudden she just disappears. She doesn't say anything, she's just gone. But she's not getting rid of me that easy, and after a minute, she's comes back on.

CS: Alright, multiply 2233 by 14.839 cents.

Me: (Multiplying madly) Ah-Ha! Got it! But how did you come up with that, it still should be 14.5, the lowest rate.

CS: That's your rate, 14.839.

Me: I heard you, but I still don't know why that's my rate and how you calculated my bill.

CS: (Sighing LOUDLY. Yeah, like I'm the idiot. You work there and it has taken you 30 minutes to finally get it right) You add the ON-Peak rate plus the Fuel Factor plus the Power Cost Recovery.

Me: What is the Fuel Factor?

CS: 5.570 cents

Me: I know how much it is, what is the definition of Fuel Factor?

CS: Blah, blah, blah. (At this point I'm not really listening, I just wanted to see if she knew)

Me: Oohh, OK. I finally got it(don't know what took her so long), but then these rates you have listed and that are advertised as "The Price To Beat" aren't really truthful.

CS: Umm. Well you have on-peak and off-peak rates and right now we are in the on-peak months.

Me: But you don't advertise the On-peak rates, so it's seems to me TXU is trying to fool their customers and customers-to-be. Shouldn't you advertise a range of rates, such as "From 14.5 to 14.839 cents"?

CS: Well, we don't want to confuse our customers.

Me: Haha! Oh, because we aren't already, right?

CS: Welll.

I did end by thanking her for helping me and told her to have a goodnight. So I wasn't a total bitch. Hey, she earned her paycheck. Do you think she'll blog about me?

Conversations With Boo

2006-07-07T20:49:00.000-07:00

Boo: "Today was Julia's birthday and I got to go to her party."

Me: "Oh, really."

B: "Yeah, but she didn't bring cupcakes or anything."

M: "Hmmph, that stinks."

B: "Yeah. Do you know how old Anna is?"

M: "Uh-uh"

B: "She's five."

Dad: "Do you know how old Temerity is?"

B: "She's four!"

M: "When will she be five?"

B: "On her birthday." (Duh)

M: "Do you know when her birthday is?"

B: "When?"

M: (Sigh)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
With Mark's sister, Aunt Lori

Boo: "I saw pictures from when my mommy and daddy got married."

Lori: "You did?"

B: "Yeah, and yoouu were in them."

L: "Yep, I was there."

B: "You were mad in the pictures."

L: "Huh? Why do you think I was mad?"

B: "You were mad because you wanted to marry my daddy!"

L: "Eww, gross! No I didn't!"

Kiss Me . . . . It's My Birthday

2006-06-22T06:41:00.000-07:00

Pssst. Hey, internets. It's Michelle's birthday today. She turns . . . umm, . . 30 something today.

Please give her a big kiss or spanking and wish her happy birthday!!!

Love ya, sis!

(Again, what happens when your sister hijack's your blog).

Ya Wanna Know What I Realized Today

2006-06-06T14:25:00.000-07:00

Me and my husband managed to rack up over $34,000 in credit card and loan debt in just 5 years. By making payments for more than what is due each month and cutting up our cards we are now down to $12,ooo. We rock. I thought we would be paying these off for the rest of our lives but nuh-uh, just another couple of years and we should be debt free! YES! (Not including house and cars of course) I'm very happy w/.....er...ourselves.

Sunday Six ~ Memorial Day

2006-05-28T14:32:00.000-07:00

Sunday Six is sponsored by Missing JT Snow. All answers are given by Boo, age 5.

1. Why do we celebrate Memorial Day?
~Cause we're sposed to.

2. How do we celebrate Memorial Day?
~Put decorations on it.

3. What is a memory?
~So you can remember stuff.

4. What is your best memory?
~To remember when I had my yellow balloon.

5. What do we cook when we BBQ?
~Barbecue chicken.

6. Where is your favorite place to BBQ?
~Outside.

Hope everyone has a nice Memorial Day!

What's The Proper Protocol When.....

2006-05-15T19:52:00.000-07:00

....you're boss is having a coughing fit and accidentally farts? Cause I just busted out laughing.

Was that wrong?

Uhhhh..

2006-05-04T21:25:00.000-07:00

I think I've forgotton how to blog....no, really.

This Week In Baseball (& Softball!)

2006-04-11T20:14:00.000-07:00

This past week my boss treated everyone to Opening Day at Ameriquest Field. We helped make him a whooole lot of money so he got us all seats in the nosebleed section. Sweeet!

Boo got to go because she is the only one not in school. The other two were kind of ticked.

Mmmm, cotton candy....

Also this week, Boo played her first ever softball game. Well, if they don't do so well in softball there is always modeling.

Practice swing!

I'm so proud of Babygirl. This past weekend she and her team got 2nd place at a 14 & Under tournament. She played like an absolute stud! Way to go girls!

Isn't She Pretty?!

2006-03-27T17:19:00.000-08:00

THIS is my new Chrysler 300 Touring. I must say it's a definite upgrade from my Isuzu Rodeo and I absolutely love it! Sooooo smooth.

My own personal car model.

I just had my windows tinted, that is why there are little green stickers on the window buttons.

Smiile for me dad-dy. Let me see your grill!

Sunday Six ~ Sleepovers & Vacations!

2006-03-26T19:33:00.000-08:00

I'm baaack. And participating in Sunday Six for the first time, which just happens to be hosted by Missing JT Snow. All answers are by Boo, age 5.

1. What is a sleepover?

Have fun.

2. What do you take w/ you to a sleepover?

Pillow & a sleeping bag.

3. What is vacation?

Fall.

4. What do you do on vacation?

Good flowers.

5. What do you do after a sleepover?

Wake up.

6. Do you like vacations?

Yeah, cause they're fun!

Apparently she knows alot about sleepovers and jack squat about vacations.

Didya play?

What Happens When Your Sister Has Your Password, Part II

2006-03-15T07:02:00.000-08:00

Where is Michelle? It's almost like where's Waldo, right?

She's here. She's around. She is in a bit of a funk, but I promise, she will be back soon. I know that we all miss her. In the meantime, to tide you over, here are some pics of her kiddos.

Michelle and Boo.

Bits, J (Michelle's nephew), and Baby Girl.

Boo, Fumble (my kiddo) and Bits.

Bits, Boo, and BabyGirl

Last, but not least, Michelle.

Tammy, who frankly, was tired of looking at Michelle's feet. And is hoping that she comes back real soon. In the meantime, everyone please encourage her.

HNT # 21 ~ I'm Sleepy, Here Are My Feet

2006-03-01T22:29:00.000-08:00

THE MAN

Well, F*@! You!

2006-02-28T21:16:00.000-08:00

Oh, and you can kiss my ass too.

LOL!!!

2006-02-27T15:28:00.000-08:00

I am #1 for the Yahoo search: How to unclogged stopped up ear. Sorry strange searcher but I don't know any amazing medical cures for that but hey, blogging worked for me!! Heehee =)

How Big Is Your Taint?

2006-02-25T13:46:00.000-08:00

If you want to laugh until you cry, go here. Brought to you by the greatness of the Daily Show.

Everybody Is Searching For Something....

2006-02-23T18:55:00.000-08:00

Some of the searches that lead people to my blog can be quite bizarre and the combination of words people look for are just baffling. But my all time favorite is the MSN search: MOM HOES!!! I was #2. I was second only to a website that advertised, PHAT HOES WITH A BIG BOOTY AND A PHAT ASS! I also get alot of wife searches. Such as: LOOK AT MY NAUGHTY WIFE, MY WIFE AND MY NEIGHBOR, TAKING PICTURES OF MY WIFE, etc., etc.

And if you specifically searched for my site in italian, please let me know who you are. You have peaked my interest.

HNT # 20 ~ To All The Girls In The House

2006-02-22T20:59:00.000-08:00

Say Happy Birthday to my beautiful girls! Babygirl turned 14 this week and Boo is sooo excited to be the big 5. Their birthdays are exactly a week apart so we have been partying hard this past week.

Show 'em some love!

Happy HNT!!! Go check out Osbasso for some more half-nekkid.

Blogging Bitches, Black Panties, And The 9 Circles Of Hell

2006-02-21T16:02:00.000-08:00

If you're looking for a recap of all the fun times had in Austin you have come to the wrong place. No, no I was there, I made the 100+ mile journey, I just ended up spending Saturday night in bed due to the fact I was SICK.

Tammy, Kami, Mommyme and Football Widow

My traveling companions were Tammy, Kami, Football Widow and Mommyme. Kami drove her very cool mini-van (with black lacy thong hanging from the rearview to aggravate F.W) on treacherous roads to get us there. It would have been a great time if I hadn't started getting car sick the second we started moving. Of course, it didn't help that Kami apparently likes to do circles while trying to find parking spots. Lots. Of. Circles.....LOTS.
(Just messing with you Kami, I had to mention the circles.)

No, there was no drinking, dancing or hanging out with fabulous women for me. My pansy excuse for a stomach had other ideas. Oh well, even though I didn't get to hang out w/ the girls I did get to meet a few of them at Cuba Libre before my stomach gave out on me. Go check out Tammy, Kami and Carrie's sites for some great pictures of all the fun had by the rest of the group.

And so everyone knows, I'll be making up for it next year. So just watch the hell out.

Happy Valentines Day!

2006-02-14T19:16:00.000-08:00

Hope everyone had a good Valentines and I hope you all get some later on tonight! Hehheh.

Momma bought herself something instead of waiting for her romantically challenged husband to come up with something. I bought a PUPPY (I know, real romantic)! He's a Siberian Husky and the most adorable puppy ever, as you can clearly see. I've wanted a husky since I was a little girl so when I saw him I had to have him. We named him Bevo after UT's mascot.

Monday I was rushing around trying to get him to go potty so I could put him in his crate, then I got dressed in a rush and left for work. I was at work for about an hour when I noticed how cold it was in the office and I put my arms around my self trying to get warm. It was then that I noticed "The Nipples".......I had forgotten to put my bra on. I had to go the whole day with no bra, completely uncomfortable and with my coworkers laughing at me.

What!? I'm Not That Old, Am I?

2006-02-06T17:16:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, on the way home from my in-laws, Babygirl asks, "Dad, will you take me somewhere and teach me how to drive?" To which he responds, "Why? You still have a couple of years before you can drive." She then says, "I can get my permit next year." I swear after she said that my mind went into overdrive: "What is she talking about, she's only 13 she can't.......WHOLLY SHIZNITS, she turns 14 in two weeks and that means she'll be 15 in a little over a year...no freaking way!!" My mind is still having trouble wrapping itself around this idea. What the hell? I was just 20 not too long ago, and she's almost 15!!! This, my friends, is why my blog is named what it is, moments like these when I'm forced to realize I am indeed a mother. And of a teenager no less.

So Mark took her and gave her a first driving lesson, in his Ford pickup which has a standard transmission. He said it went well aside from all the stalling and drifting into the other lane while trying to shift gears. She is determined to learn how to drive it which makes me proud because I never learned how to.

This is just too strange. My baby, driving.

Belated HNT ~ Anybody Up For A Wet T-Shirt Contest?

2006-02-02T20:14:00.000-08:00

Hey now. Look at what I got today. Gotta love the pink bra showing through.

I can't wait, I'm so excited!!!

By Dose Is Sdobbed Up....

2006-01-30T16:07:00.000-08:00

I hate being sick. Why is one side of my nose completely clear and the other side completely stopped up? It's driving me insane! I blow and I blow and nothing comes out. Sudafed, Benadryl, Nasalcrom. Nothings helping. Somebody help me, pleeeeaaaasse.

This is my nose on a keychain.
Charming, huh?

On a lighter and less disgusting note, I'm about to get to 1o,000 on my stat counter. Let me know if its you!! Oh, oh....THANK GOD, my left ear just got unclogged. Whoohoo, I can hear!

HNT #16 ~ Naughty Or Nice?

2006-01-26T19:12:00.000-08:00

What am I thinking? You tell me.
Don't forget to go see my hunny! Happy HNT!

My Hoes And The Babygirl

2006-01-24T19:49:00.000-08:00

This past weekend at my goofy sister, Tammy's birthday party I met fellow bloggers Kami and the Football Widow. Very cool I must say because now I can tell people I've met someone over the internet. Oooooooo. Here is a picture I totally stole from Kami's site.

Football Widow, Tammy, Kami. Bella!
We are all going to the Blogger Blowout 2006 in Austin. I couldn't be anymore excited, it's going to rock! Whooohooo!

My 13 yr old is going to be in HIGH SCHOOL! next year and she is trying out for her school's Renaissance English class, which is a level higher than honors english. I'm very proud of her for going for the top, she is an incredible writer with an amazing imagination. She wowed her english teacher and made a perfect score on the Texas standardized test, getting a 4 out of 4. She's going through a rough time right now and she really deserves this. I really hope she gets it. Wish her luck!

Babygirl.

My Boy

2006-01-22T20:23:00.000-08:00

This is Bits, The Shaggy-haired. My only son. He has a love/hate relationship w/ his Gameboy. You may recall my rant about someone headbutting their Gameboy and breaking it, well that was him. I was nice(stupid) enough to buy him another one for Christmas, hoping that he had learned his lesson, because if there is something I have learned from being a mother it is that Gameboy's keep them quiet (not arguing) when there is nothing else to do. Especially in the car on a long trip, none of that "Stop touching me, you're on my part of the seat!" crap. One of the greater inventions of man, the portable gaming system.

In these particular pictures, taken by my wonderful sister, we see him standing on his head playing his beloved. People, he stayed this way for 20 minutes, at least. How does one manage that? It would make me sick having the blood rushing to my head. It didn't even phase him. He must play better this way or something, cause he does these weird positions while playing all the time. Well, at least it keeps him from headbutting the darn thing.

Robert Tilton

2006-01-21T13:53:00.000-08:00

I'm sorry, I may be immature but this is just funny! I've seen the first two but 4 & 5 are great. He speaks and acts like he knows what's gonna happen w/ his video.

BLAH...

2006-01-07T22:27:00.000-08:00

I'm tired. I feel like I'm constantly at work. I'm not spending the time with Mark and the kids like I want and it sucks. My oldest is going through a really hard time because of her real father and I feel like I'm not giving her the attention she needs. Her therapist said that she needs a psychiatric evaluation because she shows signs of depression and OCD and may need to be on medication. The thought of that makes me cringe. I seriously think I may have decided to go back to work at the wrong time. If I didn't need the money I would've already quit.

On a different note, have you ever tried to like someone but no matter what you do you just can't quite manage? How do you like someone that talks behind other peoples back, flaunts their intellect, looks down on people that aren't as smart, loves to point out people's flaws, and who is basically just lazy? It's hard to like this person, but I have to force myself. I'm not going into who it is and most of you bloggers will know why.

Sorry about the crappy post but I needed to get it out of my head. Unfortunately, it doesn't really make me feel any better.

Happy New Year!!

2006-01-02T16:08:00.000-08:00

I'm baaaack. Hope everyone had a great New Year, mine was good. Kept the drinking at a minimum so no hangover. Yea, me!

I don't know why I even bother but my New Year's resolution this year is, drumroll please, I'm going to stop cussing so much. I know you may think that it is an easy one but not for me. I have a long history of swearing. I said my first "shit" after one of my school mates in 5th grade said it in front of me and I thought, "Whoa, he just said shit. He's so cool." Stupid, yes but I was 10 yrs old.

The reason I want to quit is because of my constant use of the F bomb. I love it. It's just so descriptive and you can use it so many different ways. F this, F that and F you! The problem is, I have children and I'm afraid it's rubbing off on my teenager. See, she has her own blog, and I caught her using my beloved F word on her site. So it's time to let little Effy go, it's gonna be hard but I'm gonna do it! Yeah!

Now, wish me luck. Lots and lots of luck.

I Know I'm On A Break, But.....

2005-12-18T20:53:00.000-08:00

....I couldn't help it. She is my muse and this is just too funny. Tammy's dog jumped up on her and scratched her nose and she got a bandaid and put it on her nose as soon as we got home. I'm just wondering how long she intends to leave it there. If she wears it to school do you think they'll think she got a nose job? Heehee!

HNT # 14 ~ Goofy Smiles

2005-12-14T16:33:00.000-08:00

Well, I think this is it for a while folks. If you are a repeat visitor then I'm sure you have noticed I haven't been blogging as often, I'm just not feeling it right now. I love participating in HNT but the rest has become a chore. I will still be around, commenting on your blogs. I'll come back when the desire returns. I love you guys! I leave you with some goofy smiles. :D

Love you, Osbasso! I'm out!

Michelley

Acronym

2005-12-11T15:01:00.000-08:00

I saw this on Osbasso's site. Very fitting.

HNT #13 ~ Christmas Pout

2005-12-07T20:04:00.000-08:00

We were supposed to go to a Christmas party given by my boss but due to the "inclement weather" it was canceled. We get the smallest amount of ice on the roads and everybody around here freaks the hell out. So here I am all dressed up and having nowhere to go I decided to takes some Christmas inspired pictures. This week I give you my pout. Marky in all his pervertedness calls them DSLs (can you guess what that means?) and wanted me to name this picture "Lips and Balls" but I said "Ew, no!" .....Ha, actually I almost did.

Make sure you go see the man who gives me my inspiration. Happy HNT!

What Would You Do?

2005-12-05T21:08:00.001-08:00

I wanted to buy the "War of the Worlds" and "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" on DVD for gifts that I have to give to coworkers, so I thought I'd get online to see who had the best price. The first thing I notice is that everyone has raised their prices, I mean Walmart had theirs "on sale" for $19.99. Since when does Walmart sell movies for that much, the last time I bought a new release there I paid $14.99. Jerkoffs are obviously taking advantage of the time of year.

Anyway, I looked at several sites and Target had the lowest prices of $15.99 and $17.99, so off to Target I go. I get up there and the damn things are $19.99. Well, I think surely they will match there online price, right? Nope, according to one person their price is set by their competitions prices and according to a manager, they don't do that.... Wait, they don't do that? I'm not asking you to match anyone else's price, I'm asking you to match your own, so what's the problem? She says we just don't match prices. The only reason I went to Target is because they had those prices listed on their website. I didn't want to be a bitch so I didn't argue with them but I did go to a couple of other stores and their prices in the store was the same as the prices given online.

Does that seem wrong to you? If not, why? If so would you have just let it go or would you have bitched to get the prices they had listed on the website?

Bitch, please!

2005-11-29T20:42:00.000-08:00

Hey, Weatherpixie! Put some damn clothes on, it's cold. Stop showing your midriff and go get a freakin' parka! Slut.

Why? Why? Why?

2005-11-28T19:05:00.000-08:00

Why do you get mad at the Gameboy game you are playing and head-butt the Gameboy? What did you think would happen once you did that? Better hand-eye coordination on your part? That the the game would stop giving you shit? No, you broke it and then say, " Well, I've done it lots of other times and it didn't break." Alrighty then.

Why do you pick up a friend from rehab and allow him to bring a crack pipe into your car? As a friend wouldn't you tell them that you want him to get better and to get rid of it. No, intead you put it in your glove compartment for the police to find after they pull your dumb ass over!

Why do you do things to make people dislike you and then freak out because, guess what, they dislike you. Mmmm, how 'bout not pissing people off in the first place OR just learn to live with the fact that you can't please all the people all the time.

Why did you get mad at me this morning when I asked you to put your things back where they go? Can I ask you a question? Do you think we have little fairies that come and clean our house everyday? Cause it ain't fairies honey. It's me who put things back where they go if you don't. K?

Felt good. Anybody else want to try?

//Edit//

OK, the second why? on the list is not a personal one. I'm not someone who hangs with the crack hoes. I was refering to former Dallas Cowboy Michael "It wasn't mine/me" Irvin who was actually being considered for the Pro Football Hall Of Fame and who now has a snowball's chance in hell of actually getting in. Obviously, this story isn't as popular everywhere else as it is here in the big D.

A Little Giggle

2005-11-22T19:28:00.000-08:00

This reminds me so much of my little ones. Enjoy them while they're little.

Oh, and while we are on the subject, this is one of the song's in Boo's repertoire. She doesn't do it so fancy but her version is at least cuter.

Oh, please, not again!

2005-11-21T19:28:00.000-08:00

I so dread the words: "Momma, come wipe my butt!" These are the times when I most definitely feel like a mom. I think Boo is torturing me for making her go to daycare. Damn daycare is atleast partly to blame for bombarding her with a whole slew of new illnesses. I have had to deal with poonami's, stinky toots, and the terrible words "Momma, I just pooped in my panties." Of course we are always in a public place when she throws that one out there. I got so fed up, a few days ago I yelled, "Hold your bowels, child!!" She just looks at me like, "what?" I just have one small request....

Dear God, please let it end! No more poop, please. no. more. (Sobs)

Aaaanyway. On a totally different note, tell me what you think. I thought I was in need of a change so I got my beautiful, sweet sister to change my template for me. I was too afraid I would totally screw something up to do it myself, so I paid her lots of money to do it. Thanks, Tam!

HNT #10 ~ All That Matters

2005-11-16T19:29:00.000-08:00

The only thing that matters is how these eyes see me.....they see the true me. I love the people behind the eyes you see here more than life itself. My family. These are the eyes that look at them with love and most of the time, understanding. I love seeing my husband when he gets home at night and there is nothing better in this world than watching your children grow. Go see Osbasso for more HNT.

Random Question #2

2005-11-15T18:59:00.000-08:00

Did anybody else notice that I look like a cartoon character in my profile picture? Why do my eyes look so big and white?

Twins?

OK People, Just Chill

2005-11-13T17:06:00.000-08:00

Let me first say, that as a general rule I really don't care for people. I usually stay amongst my family and the friends I have made so far in life, so me getting a job where I have to deal with dozens of people a day is kind of unusual. Maybe that's why by the time I get home I need a little me time so I can decompress.

This week at work was interesting. On Tuesday, I had this woman come in and as soon as she walked up to the front desk I could tell she was one of the reasons I am the way I am. To start with she had this don't fuck with me look on her face and when I asked her if she had an appointment, she said yes as if I had just asked her if she would like me to stick my pen up her nose. Anyway, I always try to be friendly and smile and with her it was no different. Well, obviously ,with this one, it was a mistake because the next thing I know one of the managers came to the front and asked to speak with me. She tells me that this woman told the doctor, my boss, that I had called her sweetheart (4 times, no less) and that it pissed her off. What! You've got to be joking, me the "anti-social" calling her, The Wicked Witch of the East, SWEETHEART, puh-lease! I would have been more likely to call her Bi-otch, than sweetheart. I don't do that, to anyone, especially dried up ole bitties who haven't had sex in 10 years. I honestly think she just didn't like the looks of me and wanted to get me in trouble. What a shithead.

I also had and old woman yell at me on the phone because we didn't have any appointments the day she wanted to come in. She yells, "WELL SHIT, JUST FORGET IT, I'LL GO SOMEWHERE ELSE!" It was the first time since I started that I had someone get pissed at me for doing my job. That one actually made me laugh.

Most people that come in are really nice so that makes up for the few that act like spoiled children and honestly I really like my job.

She's Listening

2005-11-12T12:34:00.000-08:00

I wanted to tell everybody about Tell Me Your Fears Friday that Femi-mommy over at Random Thoughts and Confessions has started. It's a great way to release things that most people keep locked up tight and she doesn't even care if you do it anonymously. I know it's Saturday but you can still do it, I haven't even had a chance to do it this week, so I am going to do it today too. Oh, and check out the button in my sidebar that Brico made.

HNT #9 ~ I Put A Spell On You

2005-11-10T06:46:00.000-08:00

I've got to get ready for work and my damn dsl was out last night so this is a quicky. I sent this picture to the people at boobie-thon last month and since it was already on my computer, I'm using it for this weeks HNT. And no Big Ed, I don't mind if you put it in your "personal use" folder. Haha!

Don't forget to go see Osbasso. Happy HNT Everyone!

Why?

2005-11-07T06:50:00.000-08:00

Oh my god, you've got to be kidding me!! I mean, I like mine but I'm not going to wear it as an accessory.

HNT # 8 ~ Come One, Come All....

2005-11-02T21:15:00.000-08:00

It's me and the hairy beast! And this week it's a 2 fer, 2 times the skin for the same low, low, LOW price!

Don't forget to go see the ringmaster!

Mmmm, hair.

My Trick Or Treaters

2005-11-02T20:43:00.000-08:00

Hey folks, sorry about the long period between posts. I just haven't been in the blogging mood. It's rough going from being a SAHM to being a working mom, I guess I needed a little bit of an adjustment period.

I know it's been 2 days since Halloween but I wanted to show you pictures of the kids in their Halloween finery.
Boo was a princess. I don't know which one, but the crown she picked out reminded me of Dora The Explorer.
Bits was a ghoul. He had these cool red light-up eyes that faded in and out, sadly you can't see them in the picture. Later that night he had an unfortunate accident involving a chainsaw. Well, a play chainsaw. One of his friends dressed up as a chainsaw wielding maniac. He was acting the part, waving the chainsaw back and forth and whacked Bits upside the head. He ended up with a pretty good size knot.
Babygirl was, as you can see, Batman. She had me buy her a cape but didn't end up wearing it. I think she was afraid to get too dressed up.

Hi Ho, Hi Ho...

2005-10-26T20:08:00.000-07:00

As you may have read when my sister hijacked my blog, I am now a working woman. I must say it is a nice change even though it is hard not being at home for my kids. Especially when Boo starts crying as I take her in to daycare.

Everyone has been really nice, explaining things thoroughly and answering all of my questions. One thing I hate about the training period is when everone is busy and I'm standing there with my thumb up my butt because I don't know what to do yet. It makes me feel like such a fifth wheel. It's alot to remember but hey, I'm smart and I'm already getting the hang of it.

I Can't Stand Some People

2005-10-24T15:21:00.000-07:00

This weekend Babygirl had one of her many softball tournaments. She has been playing since she was 6 yrs old and has played select ball since she was 8. She is very good at it and enjoys it immensely. My husband helps coach her team and we both enjoy watching her, taking part in cheering them on and helping out the team with whatever they need.

Having said that, there is just one thing that will eventually drive me insane. Other parents. I'm one of the people that is of the mind that if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all. (Well, when it comes to kids, anyway.) I can't stand people that are negative and yell shitty things to or about the kids on the opposing team. I must say more often than not it is a woman that does these kind of things, which quite frankly blows me away because I would never do some of the things that I've seen these woman do. I try to keep all of my comments positive and I don't ever say anything about the other team or its players.

This weekend two mothers that have their daughters on Babygirl's team, sat and bitched about other players on our team! You read right, players from our own team. Granted, they weren't yelling it out loud but they were saying things that other parents could hear.(Which I don't think they realized.) And they did it every game. If one of the players made a mistake, they would sit there and pick them apart. It made me sick! Why would you do that? Their daughters weren't perfect but did they say catty shit(or did anyone else) when one of them would mess up, hell no. I made sure I parked my ass right next to them so if one of them had something to say, they could say it right to my face. But of course, neither one of them said anything with me sitting next to them. Not only that but one of the mother's sat and bitched her daughter out in the middle of the tournament. How is she suppose to play when she is upset and crying? Luckily the coach went over and talked to her and got her calmed down. It's parents like these that give sport's parents a bad name!

What Happens When Your Sister Has Your Password

2005-10-24T09:10:00.000-07:00

You blog gets stolen. Or hacked into, anyway.

Dear Readers,

Please give Michelle a very big internet (((((((HUG)))))). She starts work tomorrow. She has not worked outside of her home in 9 years.

Good Luck, Sis!!

Lova ya,
Tammy

My Poor Boo - The Dreaded 4th Yr Shots

2005-10-20T16:15:00.000-07:00

Today Boo and I went to get her 4 yr vaccinations.
It's never pleasant to have to take your children
to do what to me amounts to torture not only for
them but for poor mom. I'm always afraid of
some strange reaction, which is really unfounded
because to this day none of my children have
suffered from anything more than feeling a little
yucky, fever and localized pain where they recieved
the shot. Then there is the guilt. How could I
allow some stranger to poke little holes in my
poor baby. Of course it doesn't help when she
looks at me with tears streaming down her face
and says, "You're a mean mommy!!" Or the time
when I went to get Babygirl's 4 yr shots and
as soon as the nurse came in to give them, she
disappears under the closest chair, screaming,
"Save me momma. Save me momma!"

Unfortunately, our insurance doesn't cover
vaccinations, so we have to go to the local city
run health clinic. As soon as we get to the
clinic, somehow she already knows what we
are there for. I'm sure at some point she
overheard the word "shot" in the days
preceding us actually going, and put two and
two together. We get in line and she starts
whining which then turns into crying and telling
me she doesn't want to get her shots and wants
to go home(more guilt). This lasts the whole
hour and fifteen minutes we are sitting in the
waiting room. All the while, all the other kids are
delightfully unaware that there is even a thing
as terrible as shots. All except this one little
prissy thing that is staring at Boo and says,
"Momma, I'm getting a shot and I'm not crying."
Which leaves me thinking, "You just wait you
little...."

Finally, her name is called and we go back. The
crying is getting louder and so is the squirming.
We walk into the room and there are 5 filled
needles sitting on the table. 5! Oh my god, why
are there 5? The nurse informs me that between
the time I got her 15 month shots and now it has
become a requirement that they get the Prevnar
and Hepititis A vaccines. Yea, that's just great! I
am trying to keep her back to the needles so she
doesn't see them and the nurse tells me to
turn her around and hold her tight. Boo goes
ballistic and I'm telling ya, tight ain't cutting it.
She kicks the nurse and is fighting with all her
might. Yep, you guessed it, more guilt. Lot's
of it. I had to put this child in a combination
head lock and leg scissors! I have never had
one of my kids react that way. Very upsetting.
Somehow, the nurse gives her all the shots and
we go to leave. She is still crying but now she's
just pissed and throws a fit all the way to the
car. We get in and I promptly say, "Hey you
wanna go get a prize?"

Guilt smirks at me from the passenger seat.....

HNT # 6 ~ Lovers

2005-10-19T21:08:00.000-07:00

"Uuuuhh, I don't like you!"

"Bullcrap!"

Go see Osbasso for more half-nekkidness.

Happy Half-Nekkid Thursday, everyone!!

Way Back Wednesday - Roadtrip!!

2005-10-19T06:55:00.000-07:00

"ROADTRIP!!!! Pull out those pictures of you and your
buddies enjoying the freedom of the open road and a
brewsky or two (not whilst driving, of course)...if
you've never been on a roadtrip you need to get out
more."

Well, MamaDuck, I definitely need to get out more,
that's without question, but the only pictures I had
of me and some friends on a roadtrip got lost when
my other computer went down. So today you get
roadtrips I took with la familia....ok, family vacations,
but we drove so it counts, K?
My first two pictures are
from one of our many trips
to South Padre Island. This
one is of me and Tammy
standing in front of the
statue of Padre Nicolas
Balli right after it had been
erected. If you have ever
been you will recognize it as
the statue that you see when
you first enter the island. See,
Nicolas was actually my
family's own personal Padre...well a great uncle to be exact,
so we were there when they put the statue up and we
visited often. The next picture is of me and Tam at the
hotel swimming pool. Did you
notice that our swimsuits
matched, I don't know if the
picture quality is good enough
for that or not, but they do.
Too funny. My last picture
is of me, Tam, and my oldest
and least wisest sister Karen
(don't ask) standing in front
of one of the springs in Hot
Springs, Arkansas. That's me
in the red short shorts. It's a
very scenic picture, isn't it?

Let me know if you played
and don't forget to check
out MamaDuck at The
Kept Woman to see all the
other Way Backers(?!)
too!
Update: Ha! OK, I just
clicked on the picture of
me and Tam in the pool
and I don't know why but
I am making the stupidest
face. It looks like I got water up my nose or something!
And the picture of us in Arkansas, what is wrong with
my legs? Did they grow and nothing else or what?
They're so long it looks unnatural! Haha! Sorry, I had to
say something because those are just too goofy looking!

Keenan

2005-10-18T12:28:00.000-07:00

Today is the 14th anniversary of mine and Tammy's
oldest brother's death. He was only 25.

He died in a car wreck when he lost control of his
truck on the service road of I35. According to a woman
who witnessed the wreck, he tried to pass her and
as he did his truck reved up real high and that's when
he lost control. The truck flipped several times
and he was ejected landing near an exit ramp. We
thought maybe his foot, which had recently been
broken and was in a cast, somehow got stuck on
the gas pedal.

Everything is very fuzzy for me the day it happened.
I remember answering the door and seeing the
cop standing there telling me we needed to call
the Lewisville Police Department. I remember my
mom freaking out, calling and being connected
with the hospital. I remember them telling her that
they were performing CPR and her rushing to call
his very pregnant wife from the phone in my sisters
room leaving me to stay on the line with the hospital.
I then remember, and this is the clearest part, some-
one coming on the line and telling me that they had
done everything they could but that he was dead.
They said it just like that, he's dead. They asked
me if I was all right and all I could say was, uh huh.
Uh, huh. I must have been in shock, because to
this day I can't remember feeling anything, I was
numb. It didn't hit me then, I don't think it really
did until after his funeral.

I still feel guilt about his death. See, he was one
of those people that would do anything for someone
they loved and I took advantage of that. I needed
someone to help me move a couple months before
his death. All though he had worked the day
I needed to move, he came and helped me without
bitching about it at all. Unfortunately, when he asked
me to go to his house to help him do some things
after he broke his foot, I initially said no, I was too
busy. Only after my dad pointed out how much he
had done for me did I go over and help him. That
is my guilt to this day, that I couldn't be as unselfish
as he was.

Love you, Keenan.

Why? Why? Why?

2005-10-14T15:52:00.000-07:00

Why do you feel the need to decorate my
furniture with marker, lots and lots of marker?

Why did you feel the need to come flying onto
the highway, speed around me as fast as you
could, just to go the same speed as I was already
going? Couldn't you have done that behind me?

And also why don't you use your blinker? That's
what it's there for. Haven't you heard of common
courtesy?

Why do you not see how wrong it is to fart right by
my head?

Why do you have to be entertained every minute
you're not sleeping? Do you always have to be doing
something? Sit and read, for pete's sake! Sit and
watch a little television. Sit with your own thoughts.
Just leave me alone for 5 minutes!

Update:Why do people have to take something that is
supposed to be fun and turn it in to something ugly?!

That is all.

Happy Half-Nekkid Thursday! - #5

2005-10-12T14:05:00.000-07:00

Hey all, my picture for HNT this week is one I
posted earlier, you will find it below(tuesday's
post). If you are one of the few who have yet to
hear about HNT go see Osbasso and he'll give
you a little lesson! Let me know if you're up!

I'll leave you with an email I received today.

Dangerous Playthings

2005-10-11T20:32:00.000-07:00

I'm in the kitchen minding my own business and
getting my sons breakfast...damn, why is this
rocking-horse here? As I go to move the horse with
my foot, somehow it gets tangled up with the
rockers on the horse and I trip over the stupid
thing. I manage to catch my self from completely
going sprawling but not before the handle on the
side of the thing's head digs deep in to my upper
thigh. Resulting in the biggest, ugliest bruise I have
ever had the pleasure of sporting. It is 4 inches
across at its widest point. Actually, this picture
doesn't even do it justice, it's alot more purpley-black
than this in real life.
Happy HNT everyone!

It goes from here to here.

Conversations With Boo

2005-10-10T13:56:00.000-07:00

While driving down the road:
Mom....Mom...Moooom!

What?

What is that green stuff in the weatter(weather)?

Huh?

What is that green stuff in the weatter?

I don't know what you are talking about, what green
stuff?

I think it's the trees and the busses(bushes).

Ooooohh kaaaay.

Tagged, again!

2005-10-06T23:22:00.000-07:00

I was tagged by Easily Amused. Sorry it took so long,
it's been a long week.

Fun with Archives
Here are the rules:The Rules:
1. Go into your archive.
2. Find your 23rd post.
3. Find the fifth sentence (or closest to).
4. Post the text of the sentence in your blog along
with these instructions.
5. Tag five other people to do the same.

My 23rd post was posted 2 day ago! Wow, shows
what a youngster I am. The post was called: "Freudian
Slip, Anyone?" It was only 2 sentences long, so I guess
I'll use the 2nd sentence. Which was:

"Go here for a perfect example."

Now to tag five people to do it too!
1. The last
2. five people
3. who have
4. yet to do
5. this!!

Freudian Slip, Anyone?

2005-10-05T15:02:00.000-07:00

I love it when people inadvertently say what they
really mean. Go here to see a perfect example.

A Weekend of Football

2005-10-03T12:48:00.000-07:00

Hope everyone had a good weekend. Mine was
good, the family and I went to watch both of
my nephews play football.

On Saturday morning we watched my sister
Tammy's son, Fumble. He's 5 yrs old and plays
flag for the Gators, he loves to play and it shows.
He is hilarious to watch because he's out there
dancing around between plays and talking
smack when he makes a play. The boy got 4
flags! Count em'. 1, 2, 3, 4. By the 3rd flag,
Marky was telling him to yell, (while waving
hand back and forth in front of face) "You can't
see me! You can't see me!" When he gets older
he is gonna be a star, I guarantee you.

Saturday night we went to my SIL's son's
football game. For the sake of privacy I'll call
him "Squints". If you have ever seen the movie
"The Sandlot" you will see the resemblance.
Anyway, Squints is 11 and plays for the
Longhorns and you just better not mess with
him. He is as onry as the day is long and doesn't
take crap off of anyone. During the game he
made a play where he cut blocked another
player, for which he received a penalty (it was
on the kickoff, which makes it illegal). Later,
he comes over and tells us that after the play
the kid he cut blocked yelled, "What the hell was
that (insert last name here)?" To which he
responded, "It was a tackle, Stupid!" That's him
to a tee.
Squints
with Bits and Boo.

Tag, I'm It!

2005-09-30T11:15:00.000-07:00

I was tagged by Rantnravenhaven. So, here goes.

Ten Years Ago: September 1995
I had been married a little over a year and living
in Dallas. I had just quit my job a month earlier to
stay home with Babygirl and because we were
planning on getting pregnant. Guess what? We were
quick because I was already pregnant!

Five Years Ago: September 2000
Pregnant again! This time with my four year old, Boo.
She was a surprise to both of our family's, they had
thought we were done after Bits. We had been living
at our current house for about 3 yrs. And well not
much else of interest because of the whole stay at
home thing.

One Year Ago: September 2004
I was watching my niece, The Princess, for my sister.
I wasn't pregnant. Babygirl was in 7th grade and had
just made the volleyball team, which we were real
excited about. We had just found out that Bits was
ahead of his class in reading, being the brainiac that
he is. And Boo? (Can't leave her out.) Just as cute as
ever.

Yesterday: Thursday.
Same old, same old. Cleaned, laundried. Found out
that we have suite tickets to the Rangers Game
tonight because my husband made Driver of the
Month at UPS. He rocks! Picked up Babygirl after
her volleyball game. And Blogged. Woo-hoo!, people
I am living in the fast lane! Get out of my way!

Today:
Sent out a couple of resumes.(Trying to find a job)
Found out from this "employment service," which
I did some testing with to see what my stong points
are, that actually I am really good with numbers
and problem solving. Can I put that on my resume?
Getting ready to go to the Rangers game.

Five Songs I Know All The Words To:
1. Crazy ~ Patsy Kline
2. Any song off of The Used CD ~ In Love & Death
3. Attack ~ 30 Seconds to Mars
4. & 5. Somebody Told Me & Mr. Brightside ~ The Killers

Five Snacks:
1. Mixed nuts
2. Pomegranate
3. Chocolate chip cookies
4. Sunflower seeds
5. I'm not hungry right now so ?

Five things I'd do with 100 million dollars:
1. Be debt free
2. Make my loved ones debt free
3. Buy a bigger house
4. Travel
5. Kids college education

Five places I'd run away to:
1. Italy, Tuscany in particular
2. Hawaii
3. New York, just to say I've been
4. France
5. Fiji

Five things I would never wear:
1. Belly shirt
2. Eyeshadow(it looks weird on me)
3. Ugly shoes(got this one from my sister)
4. Anything itchy
5. Turtlenecks

Five Favorite TV Shows:
1. Real Time w/ Bill Marr
2. House
3. ER
4. The Shield
5. The Sopranos

Five greatest joys:
1. Marky
2. Babygirl
3. Bits
4. Boo
5. My family

Five favorite toys:
1. Computer
2. My CDs(old fashioned girl)
3. Cellphone
4. Marky(heehee)
5. DVD player

Current Reads:
1. Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince
2. Daily newspaper
3. Swans Song
4. Haunted America
5. Good Housekeeping(how fitting)

Five People I am tagging to do this:
Don't have five, so I'm tagging:
1. Big Ed
2. Norman
3. Mamaduck
4. Whomever else wants to play. If you did, let me know and I'll come visit.

Finally! HNT#3 - A Shoulder To Cry On

2005-09-29T08:14:00.000-07:00

Happy Half-Nekkid Thursday everyone!
Leave me comments and let me know if
your up. For all of you slowpokes that don't
know about HNT, head on over to Osbasso's
and check out the guidelines and all the other
half-nekkid people!

The Strange Case Of The Shocker

2005-09-28T14:18:00.000-07:00

The Shocker: What my husband jokingly
threatens me with every since he heard
about it on The Ticket radio station here
in the Dallas area. Seems a whole bunch of
high school kids got in trouble for doing this
"hand gesture" in their high school
photographs. Make sure you take note of the
other names they give it. Marky finds it all
soooo hilarious.

Funnyface

2005-09-26T20:43:00.000-07:00

I found this picture of Boo when I was looking
through pictures the other day. She used to
make this face and breathe in and out of her
nose real hard. It still cracks me up to think
about it. She is my little comedian, she makes
me laugh constantly.

She stayed at my mom's the other day and when
I went to get her my mom said she had been
singing London Bridge and saying something
about a naked woman. So I asked her to sing the
song to me and this is what she sang: "London
Bridge is falling down, falling down, falling down.
London Bridge is falling down, my bare lady!"

Having Fun....

2005-09-26T14:43:00.000-07:00

Cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping, oh my. You
know, I would really like being a SAHM if it weren't
for all the boring shit I have to do.

I'll try to blog later all, you know when my schedule
isn't so completely full!

Rita's Coming! Everybody Take Cover!

2005-09-23T16:47:00.000-07:00

Yeah, it looks like we are in for some rain.
Luckily it seems to be weakening and
turning more to the east so maybe it won't
be so bad here where we are. With that said
I'd also like to say: "People calm down,
for real!"I live in Dallas and people are just
completely freaking out. All the water is gone,
all the gas is gone. WE LIVE IN DALLAS FOR
PETE'S SAKE! Chill!!

Hope everybody has a good weekend! And for
my fellow Texans, stay dry!

HNT#2 - A Liiiiittle Bit More Skin

2005-09-22T11:41:00.000-07:00

For my 2nd
HNT a little
more me! Go
see Osbasso
for more HNT.